Guest Post by OM PRASAD
Open Letter to Karate Kid aka JNU Vice Chancellor, The Man Who Can Never Stop Smiling, Who Uses Photoshopped Images, Who Loves Running… Who Doesn’t Deserve to be Called Vice Chancellor
Mr. Vice Chancellor,
I have consciously decided to do away with the etiquette of using the word ‘Dear’ while addressing you because I have tried hard and failed to come up with a single reason to show any dearness towards you, for you have amply proved that you deserve none. The Hunger Strike has today enters its 15th Day and I am worried about my friends who are showing great courage and determination against the obduracy and insensitivity of your ‘team’ as you so love to call the coterie around you in the Pink Palace, but I am more worried about you and your team.
I am worried about how they will survive in a university where students and teachers have no trust in you, in a university where in the dhabas and mess halls you are becoming popularly known as a liar. I have been a student in this university for the last seven years and hope to be one for a couple of more, but let me tell you I have never seen a more timid and insensitive person in my entire time here and I have had the privilege of seeing the predecessor of your predecessor, B. B. Bhattacharya, but it looks like you are going to force me to review my views about ‘Bhatta’. He once addressed a gathering of students, assembled to protest pathetic medical facilities after a student died of asthma because the ambulance did not have proper facilities, by showing students an inhaler and asking why students can’t carry inhalers with them. But you have emulated and surpassed him, you have shown a set of sparkling teeth to anyone who has gone to appeal to revoke the punishments with absolutely no remorse, surely you are not human and considering that you are an expert in martial arts you may well be a ninja.
I saw you for the first time in person when you were sneaking into the AC meeting, yes, I was the person standing on your right raising slogans against you and I couldn’t believe that you arrived with a security jeep escort before you, along with your car to cover a distance of a mere 100 meters. I have seen VCs walking right through protesting students and teachers but you, in spite being a ‘karate kid’, took an escort car to cover 100 meters (a distance which you later showed to be capable of covering in record time). Maybe you wanted to hide even from the nilgai who I have heard decided in their GBMs that you are not worth looking at, forget running the university.
The second time I got a glimpse of you was yesterday when you decided to climb down from your abode in the Pink Palace to meet the students sitting on hunger strike. Of course before coming out you were caught looking through the glass doors checking if B. B. Bhattacharya was around to admonish you for spoiling his record. But you came nonetheless; your ‘prakat’ was more ‘kapat’ as you gave one of the most bewildering lectures on political science by saying that we will respect the decision of the court. Wah! As if you have the option not to. But let me jog your memory a little, a student called Gautam Sharma won a court case in January this year. He was forced to go to court because the JNU administration, in its usual vicious obduracy, decided to keep flouting legal norms on OBC reservations. The Delhi High Court verdict stated that JNU was wrong.
And now, when you have received another rap on the knuckles from the HC, you are trying to yet again scuttle legal provisions regarding OBC reservations, by denying the relaxation to OBC students in the minimum eligibility marks required in the JNU entrance exam! Want us to remind you of the Delhi HC 2010 and SC 2011 verdicts?? Care to abide by the law, Mr VC? Forget about abiding by the law, the administration is now adopting guerilla tactics and passing off forged signatures of JNUSU Office bearers to scuttle OBC reservations. But you are finicky I know, like a snobbish wine taster, this is also visible among the members in your team especially a character called Hanuman Sharma, the Controller of Evaluation, who before evaluating other, needs to be evaluated first.
We are in a lot of confusion as to who this ‘pavanputra’ is because in many places he is described as Colonel and in other places as a Professor. Colonel yes, but professor I am not sure. He loves making people wait, who want to meet him. Does he make you also wait or does he come running to you at the ring of a bell? Let me tell you if your ironed blue shirt got wrinkled during your ‘Great Escape’ from the AC meeting it’s all because of him. The students were desperately asking you to come back but Hanumanji had different ideas. He was insisting on a tango waltz by putting his arms around your waist and swinging and swerving with you to the Ad Block from the AC meeting. The ABVP who had gathered there had tears in their eyes as they saw Hanumanji taking personal care and making his namesake proud with his devotion to you, his prabhu. Later some even looked towards heaven and stared shouting ‘today is Tuesday; Lord Hanuman has answered our prayers and escorted the VC from the AC’.
Today’s papers have reported that Hanumanji has asked different centers to provide answer keys for the upcoming JNU entrance exams. Even for subjective ones. Is he planning to apply to JNU, for without knowing the answers beforehand he would not get through, for he is incapable of thinking though he may be an expert in dancing, especially with you as his ballet partner. We know that in 1993 the JNU admission call letters went with ABVP’s welcome note attached with them, Hanumanji should stick to dancing with you and not try doing a Vyapam here.
I don’t mean to insult you because you can’t be insulted. You are immune to all that. But I wanted to ask you if you adorned your office with the flowers Rama gave you inside the AC meeting and savored the succulent fruits that were presented to you. It was a gift from us to congratulate you for perfecting the copy of Modi’s Wax statue at Madame Tussaud’s as a reaction to the Hunger Strike, hope your striking poses inside the AC were sent to our venerable PM. How you must be wishing you could bail him out and pull out a degree in ‘entire Political Science’ from JNU for him. How desperate you must be but for us ‘unruly teachers and students’.
Finally I have been very curious about the different photographs of you that I have seen on the net. How come none are in a academic environment? In the available photos you are displaying your sparkling set of teeth or with hands spread out in manner to receive someone from heaven or with a photoshopped one of you in a blue shirt in a blue background with the JNU logo superimposed on it. (I have left out the more juicy ones). Why photoshopping? Do you know who is the person famous for photoshopping his images? Your very own boss Mr. VC, PM Narendra Modi.
Lastly, as a student of JNU who is also an activist, let me tell you, you have been sent to the wrong university. You should have never crossed the Aruna Asaf Ali Marg. The students and teachers of this University will haunt you for the rest of your lives. We will continue our fight, for this university has taught us above all to fight, fight and fight. Our fight will haunt your dreams here’s hoping that Hanumanji will come to escort you in your dreams too.
Om Prasad is a student at JNU and a member of AISA.