Analysing a bank’s financial statements is a bit like suing your family lawyer for malpractice; the jury may be on your side but the evidence is invariably circumstantial.  However, in times such as these  when even charities are screwed by their bankers – it is best not to trust anyone. Worry not, we at Kafila are not just concerned with playing theory-theory and pseudo-secular Hindu-bashing, we are also deeply concerned about the financial crisis – it has a direct impact on the bonuses taken home by our CEO and board-members. Accordingly, I offer you a simple step by step way to figure out when your bank will go under.Written in an easy conversational style, this post is an invaluable tool pedagogic for Kafila readers both young and old. Stay with me guys, this is going to be fun.

First a bit of background: In May 2008, Vikram Pandit finally stamped his authority on the behemoth company that he had been chosen to lead. Signalling a bold break from the past, he replaced Citigroup’s 2007 slogan “Let’s get it done” by reviving Citigroup’s 1970s slogan “The Citi Never Sleeps”.   While the new/old ad campaign is sure to bring back memories of more profitable times, the firm’s precarious financial situation suggests that The Citi apart, Pandit won’t be getting much rest either. Mystery Question: What will it take to wipe Citi out?

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